Everything Shrinks in Divorce Except Expectations

This weekend I read an interesting article in the Wall Street Journal, The Incredible Shrinking Everything by Joe Queenan.  He tells us that nearly everything is shrinking. Yeah, yeah. I knew about the juice containers shrinking. What I hadn’t realized were the shorter solos by Eric Clapton and the lower basketball scores from 2000 to 2011. Shrinkage.

His column reminded me of the shrinkage I see in my business. Bank accounts shrink. Patience shrinks. Lifestyles shrink. What surprises me is the frequently unrealistic optimism of people in divorce.

Sure, everyone is hurt and angry and scared. But they are strangely optimistic (or blind) about their financial future. They really don’t grasp how much their financial security will shrink when they create two households from one.

Nobody likes to cut back on their lifestyle. Not even the wealthy. It’s hard to do. I have come to the conclusion that we humans have great difficulty accurately imagining negative change. We can talk about it. We can rationalize the change. But we can’t seem to feel it until it hits us between the eyes.

So, how does this relate to divorce financial planning? I recommend that if you are considering divorce, you financially pretend you already are there. First you have to figure out your post divorce cash flow. Then you have to actually live on less income for a while. Try it out for a month. Eat out less. Don’t buy those shoes. Shop for store brand items. Clip coupons. Live the shrinkage. It will make your divorce just a little bit easier to handle. You will be better prepared for financial reality.